Shelly Frome - Writer and Novelist
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The writer/editor skirmishes

3/17/2015

8 Comments

 
When you’re assigned a new editor who turns out to be a grammarian and refers to the Chicago Manual of Style and other authorities, even though you’ve submitted what you thought was a final polished draft, you may very well be in for it.
 
Through the mechanism of Microsoft Word’s track changes, it’s not just the typos you’ve inadvertently missed that are corrected in red, it’s other things like the “Oxford serial comma” thanks to the Oxford University Press.

And so here I was with all those corrections in red and my only defense to strike back in blue. For instance, my laconic central character can’t wait till he sees Laura again. The editor strikes out “till” and inserts “until” and does it over and over again, thus altering this Indiana farm boy’s clipped thought pattern. Another character (a thug from the mean streets of the Lower East Side) says, “You will do this thing or else.” She inserts a comment demanding to know or else what? Which would throw off the character’s rhythm, not to mention the dangling threat. How silly would it be if he finished the sentence by saying  “. . . there will be dire consequences”?  And so on it goes.
 
Speaking of rhythm, back to the comma war.  It seems there are two schools of thought. One plays it by ear, using the comma to mark a pause. Since I read over my work as if I were telling the tale, a comma at the end of a series of thoughts would feel like taking a breath. On the other hand, a serial comma supposedly is a necessity for clarification—e.g, She listed the projects she wanted done, made the assignments, and rushed out the door.  For me and my sense of rhythm, that comma before the “and” just breaks up the flow.

Of course the Internet, in its hell-bent rush, is full of examples that would be  ridiculous without a serial comma. “The country-and-Western singer was joined onstage by his two ex-wives, Kris Kristofferson and Waylon Jennings.” No argument there. Can we just say  it all depends?

However, after the first pass and hundreds of red markings followed by blue counter-strokes, something had to give. At this rate, the editor and I would be working at cross purposes, would never get along, and the manuscript would have no chance to get back to the publisher in time. (Note the comma before the “and” which in this case seems to fit)

Needless to say, we came to a compromise. All I can hope is that readers will be carried along by the story and won’t find themselves sputtering here and there without quite realizing why.   

 

 

8 Comments
Marja McGraw link
3/17/2015 03:27:54 am

Good post, Shelly. We can't always use perfect grammar and punctuation, especially in dialogue, or if the story is first person. And, yes, commas can slow down the action. I'm glad you stuck up for yourself in this case. Sometimes it's necessary.

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Patricia Gligor link
3/18/2015 02:48:15 am

Loved the post, Shelly! I belong to a writers' critique group and one of the members writes romance and fantasy. It seems that every time we meet, she's talking about the way her editor/s "over" edits her manuscripts. I get a headache, just listening. Enough is enough!
By the way, I completely agree with you in the fourth paragraph of your post, I think the last comma should go!

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Cyndi link
3/18/2015 03:18:15 am

Editors and grammarians and English teachers will always find something to disagree about - and I'm in all three categories! The writer in me wants one thing; the editor another (but I'm definitely on the side of the Oxford comma!). And my REAL editor usually wants a third option.

And just like in parenting, I've learned to choose my battles.

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Nancy Poling link
3/24/2015 07:05:07 am

What's happened to the idea of a unique voice? Once, in compiling an edited volume, I was very conscious of allowing each woman to have her own voice. The editor went through as if it were academic writing. I went over his head.

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shelly frome link
3/25/2015 12:19:52 am

Thanks, Nancy.
There are so many loopy worlds out there, it's a wonder what keeps us going.

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GeraniumCat
8/25/2015 11:42:36 pm

Goodness! Your editor sounds as though she was a bit out of her milieu. It's all very well to insist on serial commas and "until" not "till" in an academic work, but fiction has its own conventions, which acknowledge that very few people speak perfect prose. And even with academic writing, which is what I edit, I like to allow each contributor to an edited volume to have their own voice - why should we all sound the same? I only edit if distinctiveness interferes with clarity.
Just to confuse matters, most British publishers don't use the serial, or Oxford, comma, despite its name! I seem to spend half my time putting it in for US publications and taking it out for British ones! Personally, I'm for playing it by ear.

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Mary Feliz link
9/20/2015 12:11:52 pm

Hi Shelly, I agree with your post. But I also wanted to offer another perspective on the till/until change. If I were editing that, I would have changed till to 'til to indicate it was a shortened form of until. Till -- to me -- is where the cashier puts your money after you pay for something.

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GABixler link
1/12/2016 07:22:34 am

I loved this! I was working with a small publisher years ago and discovered that there are two types of readers/editors...One is something like you had--apply the rules or else. The other, me, is a reader for content. What that means is that I work to understand the writing style of the respective writer... It does make a difference in how your rhythm is perceived by the selected editor...The selection of until versus 'til just has to be based upon your writing as opposed to proper grammar...and by the way, those who use spell and grammar check as their sole source will get you further in trouble than you were prior to submitting your manuscript. Editors, like Reviewers, should be reference-checked, don't you think? Best, Glenda

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    AUTHOR
    Shelly Frome is a member of Mystery Writers of America, a professor of dramatic arts emeritus at the University of Connecticut, a former professional actor, and has written over twenty-five plays and novels. His latest is the New York caper       Murder Run 

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